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Jan 31, 2017

Why every mom needs a sister

I walk in to dinner with my sister and start with out skipping a beat:
 "The other day I had a funny thought that I got up to run to the store and leave you with the kids and you were like "Where do you think your going?" 
So I said "To buy toilet paper and Pepsi" 
"You can't leave me with all the kids" 
"Watch me" 
"You do and I'll give them all juice and let them watch paw patrol the whole time" 
"You wouldn't" 
"I would"
 "Then I'll tell them about the leftover cake in the fridge and that you will share with whomever can cut this price of paper into the smallest pieces" 
"I'll let them craft with glitter on your carpet" 
"I introduce your 6 year old to beat boxing" 
"I'll buy all of your kids recorders for Christmas" .... 
At this point she is just smiling and nodding barely able to control her laughter, only it's not because she thinks I'm funny.  It's because a Goodrich can't help but laugh at her own joke (It's science). Even if she just has the one joke because it always works.
  "...Leggings are not pants" 
"Mom bun is not a hair style" 
"Diet Pepsi is not breakfast" 

Then she cracks.
"And then what happened Christina?" 
and we are rolling. 

Because only a sister can crack you up with the same question every time you take off on a long winded imaginative tangent and drag them along for the ride. (Which is way more often than I care to admit) Only a sister will listen to said tangent then spend the next twenty minutes making up good mom insults with you and try to record a video of said disses to save for posterity or a really humiliating family reunion. Only a sister will talk about the same struggles over and over with newfound encouragement and wisdom very time you mom fail and have genuine excitement when your 2 year old poops in the potty without an incentive. 

Then there is my other sister. The one who asks for advice she never takes and tells me my political ideas are stupid to my face (while everyone else is making the crazy sign when they think I'm not looking) she is so blunt it drives me crazy. The only other person I know who even comes close to telling it like it is the way she does is... me. (It's funny how what draws you to others is what you see in your self too) We don't always get along but we always have each others back and there is something to be said for fierce loyalty in a PC world. The funny thing is though, the more different we become the more I love her, because when you love someone different than you, you love their soul and can see the best in them even when they can't. If you're good to each other you point it out. Having a bond like sisterhood too means that you forgive faster, love deeper, and can be more honest sooner than you can in other friendships. Which gives you the grace to be your real, genuine, unfiltered self knowing that even if they think you're nuts they are not going anywhere and love you anyway.

As much as I love my sisters the fact is I have many more sisters. Sister in laws that are every much family in my heart as if they had always been there. Friends who showed up (when I was laid out on the floor and couldn't move and did my laundry) or weren't afraid to get very real and very personal when I just needed to be seen as an interesting individual instead of just my favorite title "mom". 

Motherhood has its own challenges and sweet rewards and women need sister's to share it (and sometimes bare it) with. Women who know them as a sister, a friend, a woman, AND a mom. All the little prices that make up who we are and when to call out and strengthen each piece. Women are social creatures and sometimes men, God bless them, don't get it. Not in a way a sister in the trenches does. Not in the way someone who has the perspective of knowing us as an awkward teen, ambitious graduate, fawning newlywed, or nervous new mom (or whatever stage they came into our life) to remind us how far we have come or the spark that is still in us. Sometimes we just need added feminine intuition or encouragement to trust our own. Sometimes we just need a reminder of who we are beyond our titles and duties. Having sisters helps us keep our sense of self alive in the most joyful way.

If you don't have a sister, reach out to another mom. She gets it and if she gets you, then you've found an invaluable treasure that will see YOU through everything life throws your way. Someone who will call you out on your crazy, laugh with you, cry with you, or just bring you chocolate and sit with you quietly on the days that are just too much. Because what is a sister but another woman who knows you best and sticks with you through it all.