We've all been there. Stuck in a rut, tired, discouraged. Maybe it's a little cabin fever from the never ending dark winter months. Maybe it's the spring "school burnout" that that hits public and homeschoolers alike. Dare I even mention postpartum blues or depression? My point is that we all have the ups and downs for one reason or another and sometimes it takes more than a "shift in attitude" to break out of a funk.I have suffered from depression a few times now and I'm not about to make light of the subject because for some there definitely is a chemical component or deeper issue that needs to be addressed. If you show signs of depression for more than 2 weeks PLEASE get some professional help because trust me you are loved and needed and they can help you feel like yourself again.
For me though I find I can usually head it off with a few simple changes:
1. Wake up! I know not everyone is a morning person and I could wax poetic about the benefits of starting your day earlier but whatever your wake up time is DO NOT sleep in. Do not mumble around the house half asleep either. When it is time to wake up start moving on your morning routine. Since we are moms I would also strongly suggest waking up before your kids or at least with them, this will feel like you have a head start advantage, having even a few minutes of quiet "me time" will be so surprisingly refreshing you may become obsessed and they won't have the time to make BIG messes before the day even starts. It also sets the tone that mom is in control and ready to take on the day (even if you are not quite there yet) which will give them a feeling of security and comfort. I know it's hard but really what quality of sleep are you getting when they are already up anyway and how fun is it to wake up to a mess or a fight? This one is a game changer.
2. Get Dressed, and I don't just mean clean yoga pants. Start your day with a fresh outfit and do your hair even if you are staying home for the day. If you are into jewelry wear it, if make up is your thing find a way to put your face on before you leave the house. I personally always feel better with some cute toenails but whatever it is that makes you feel like you would be happy to run into someone you know, get your self to that point at the start of your day.
3. Clean. I don't mean clean your whole house or break out the white gloves I mean tidy up the space you are going to be living in for the day (usually the kitchen or living room) You will feel like you've accomplished something at the start of your day which may set "getting things done" attitude in motion or at least you can't bemoan having done nothing all day when life gets real. You will also have a blank slate to start from and would be surprised at how much more peaceful the kids are in a clean peaceful environment, suddenly the "I'm bored" turns into creative play. It's also a good way to practice being more mindful and in the moment as you wipe down counters or re shelve books. This is also a great one to get the kids out of their funk too. Working on a project together will help bond you and give them a sense of accomplishment.
4. Do one thing to Set Yourself up for Success. Whether that is starting a load of laundry because you notice your kids are on their last pair of pajamas, starting the dishwasher so you don't have to scrounge for spoons, make a grocery list before going to the store, or putting dinner in the crock-pot because you know that evening is going to be crazy. Do one thing where later you can say "Thanks past self, you really got my back".
5. Go Outside! Seriously, even if it is just to the front lawn or if it is cold outside then leave the house to run an errand or grab a soda. The fresh air will wake up your lungs, you and the kids won't feel couped up or trapped in the house, vitamin D REALLY helps with depression, and there is a lot of detail in a snowflake or garden to help you get out of your own head. I usually like to combine this one with the next one too.
6. Exercise. Especially if you can't be outside very long. Find away for you to move your body by doing a workout video, going tot the gym, an impromptu dance party. Take the kids to a play land or a indoor jump house. I really like doing yoga because the slow stretches leave you feeling refreshed and not flushed and it's something I can do even if I'm dealing with a back injury or a pregnancy. Also when you are down you don't always move very fast but this brings you into intentional movement.
7. Teach your Kids Something New. This isn't a novel concept for homeschoolers but maybe it means stepping away from the curriculum for the day to explore something that caught their interest. Maybe it means talking about their grandma or growing up on a farm. Perhaps you just spend a little more time reading to them, pull out the painting supplies, or let them pick a game to play with you. This connecting with them in a meaningful way will help them feel loved, help you to step out of a routine that may be stifling both your growth and theirs, and help you to see your daily work in a new light.
8. Take a Shower or a bath. Sometimes you just need to clear your head under some running water, be alone, take a few breaths and come back at it. I actually like to shower in the late afternoons. I have long hair that takes several hours to dry and don't want to be held back by it in the morning or go to sleep with wet hair, it also refreshes me the way the naps refresh my kids so I'm ready for the evening rush, but find a time that works for you and some good smelling shampoo :)
9. Call a Friend or better yet meet up with one! I don't mean like their Facebook status or text about the PTA meeting. I mean call them on the phone and ask about their day. This helps you get out of your own horriblizing and pity parties by thinking about others. It's also always fun to talk to someone you connect with and can give you a fresh perspective. It can also lead to...
10. Do an Act of Service. Yes as moms everything we do is service to our kids, which is great, but I'm talking about getting out of your world and into someone else's. Is there a neighbor who is sick and might like a fresh loaf of bread? Do you know an new mom who could use a few hours of baby sitting? Can your kids make cards for their great grandma and hand deliver them? Can you practice reading with your nephew? or teach your neighbor to cross stitch? Using your talents to bless others helps you feel needed and valued. I find it best when the kids can participate too because then they get to feel the joy of serving, it gives them something to do, and it teaches them how to be aware of the needs of others.
11. Go to Bed. I know that "me time" is so important when you are feeling consumed but do you need 5 hours of it into the middle of the night? What is the quality of the me time you're getting on your 6th episode of binge watching Hulu? By all means take some time to watch a show, catch up on a blog, or have a piece of chocolate but then go to bed early enough that waking up tomorrow wasn't as hard as waking up today. One that goes hand in hand with this is
12. Turn Off Your Screens. It helps you fall asleep quicker and get better rest. It also helps you be present instead of using Pinterest, Facebook, Instagram, etc. as an escapist method. Not having our phone to look at constantly helps you face what it is that is bothering you and make better use of our time by being productive, connecting with others, or simply getting more restful sleep.
*Bonus tip* I know not everyone is religious but for me spending time on my knees in prayer and in the Word of God is foundational to feeling peace. I often slip out of these habits but even just asking for help to get through the day can give me so much strength and serenity I couldn't write this post without mentioning the grace that God offers us through his Son that can help us overcome all things. Including ourselves.
What helps you break out of the blues?
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